Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Samhain Tarot Reading

Although I was exhausted and couldn't wait to crawl into bed, I had to make sure I did at least one Tarot reading this Samhain. In past years, I have used a simple 13-card calendar spread for the changing of the year from old to new. But this year I wanted something a little more specific to Samhain, and I found this layout (by someone named tabi) online.

I can't exactly say I was excited at first glance. Not a great deal of "happy-happy--joy-joy" to be had here. But we take what we get, right? (And besides, the past year hasn't exactly been all sunshine and posies, either.)

Position 1: Harvest: What am I thankful for?
Card: VIII of Cups

The VIII of Cups usually has to do with searching for a deeper meaning, being weary, or moving on. From Samhain 2006 'til now was probably the roughest patch of my life so far. But it has gotten better. I've gotten better, and for that I am extremely thankful. Not all growth spurts are easy, and I am both grateful that I've grown as a person, and thankful that things are settling down somewhat now.

Position 2: Night: What is beginning for me now?
Card: IV of Pent

The IV of Pentacles is a card that's about being possessive, obsessed with control, and blocking change. This card is a little more difficult for me to interpret as it is in the "beginning" position. I don't like change, not one bit, but I can't really see how this is beginning, as it has always been a part of who I am. I think the answer probably lies more in the possessive/control freak area, but I'll have to get back to you on what that means as I live it. It would make sense, though, as a lot of the past year has been completely out of my control.

Position 3: Bonfire: What lights my path to it?
Card: II of Cups, Reversed

The II of Cups, Reversed, has to do with connections, truces, and attractions, and varying stages of each. This card makes sense to me. I have a very close friend with whom I had been out of touch with for some time, and we are in the process of becoming close again. I am gaining a great deal of strength from this friend, and he has helped me weather the storm of the past year. He is also my sounding board and reality check, and I can see him keeping me from going too wacky over my control issues. This card makes sense to me.

Position 4: Sacrifice: What must I give up in order to move forward?
Card: VI of Cups

The VI of Cups was the card that I looked at and went "Bang on!". It is the card of good will, childhood and innocence, and the fact that it came up in the sacrifice position made me nod in agreement. Possibly one of the biggest changes in me in the past year was that I finally grew up. I lost my innocence. My illusions were shattered. For several months I was the walking wounded, shell-shocked and unable to breathe because it hurt too much. Until I was able to accept some of the things that happened, until I was able to let go of what I had always held to be true, I couldn't start to come back to the surface. I'm not fully there yet, but I'm on the mend. It hurt like hell, and I'm a different person now, but it was necessary for my journey.

Position 5: Ashes: What covers/protects me?
Card: VI of Pentacles

This one stumped me a little bit. The VI of Pentacles is a card that focuses on the having or not having of resources, knowledge, and power. Most of the time I feel like I don't have enough of any of these. I'm always carefully watching the gas gauge, praying it'll make it to pay day. I'm sometimes convinced by others that I'm under-qualified to do the job I do (even though lots of people think I do just fine, thanks). And I've already mentioned the control freak thing. But ultimately, when I think about it, I'm doing okay. I have enough to keep going, and enough control over my own life. Perhaps the purpose of this card was to point out to me that I'm doing okay.

Positions 6, 7 and 8: The spirits that guide me on this journey
Card 6: VII of Cups, Reversed

The VII of Cups, Reversed, is all about wishful thinking, options, and dissipation. One of the possible interpretations is that the bubble has burst, that the illusions have been let go. Perhaps a lifetime of building those illusions was necessary in order for this lesson to have the devastating effect it did? I'm a little confused by this one, but maybe it will become more clear as life moves on?

Card 7: XIII Death

This card always scares people when it comes up in readings, and I'll admit that even I heaved a huge sigh of apprehension when it came up. But the Death card doesn't necessarily mean someone's going to die. It's about endings and transitions, eliminations and forces that are bigger than we are. It makes perfect sense to me that this card came up because a) I'm entering a new period in my life, b) the old me is pretty much dead, and c) a lot of the pain I went through in the past year literally had to do with deaths of loved ones. I'm not sure how the whole "spirit guide" thing works here, but the card itself seems applicable.

Card 8: XVIII The Moon

The Moon is related to fears, illusions, bewilderment and the imagination. I feel like I'm beating a dead horse here, but I guess if you take into account everything else I've said during this interpretation, this card also makes perfect sense. In other words, please see above.

So that was my Samhain Tarot reading. Not all sweetness and light by any stretch of the imagination, but certainly appropriate, given everything that has gone on in my life in the past year. The fact that the cards were mostly Cups and Pentacles show that my chief concerns were emotional and material matters, and the two Major Arcana cards bringing up the end as a one-two punch indicates just how deeply affected I was, how strong the year's influences were on me.

Happy New Year! (And I'm glad that one's over with!)

No comments: